Let’s talk about vanity metrics, shall we? For those unfamiliar with what vanity metrics are, it’s typically the “Likes,” “Comments,” “Followers,” and more, which is often used to understand engagement but just a hint: there’s more to engagement than the Likes and Comments, but that topic is for a later time.
I’m talking about how Vanity Metrics do absolute terror to mental health.
I mentioned this in my recent video, but I noticed so many people upping their social media game in January. (Major props to all!) However, that freaked me out, causing me to believe I need to do the same. I felt like I needed to post frequently. I needed to show everything. I needed to show up on ALL my platforms. I needed to act like I’m making moves when I’m in my room, freaking out at just the thought of where I’m going to get my next source of income.
My thumb aches because of the constant refreshing I did to see the Likes rack up after posting a photo or seeing who wanted to comment/DM me about something. First of all, embarrassing. Second of all, LOL.
Where did that get me? Nowhere. I’m stuck staring at everyone else on social media, asking myself why I can’t that many likes and followers. This mindset led me to think that once I get 10K+ followers, I’m one step closer to getting free items to randomly review or somehow land a dream job based on my ability to have so many followers.
What is that?!
That’s when I knew something was wrong. The fact I was so wrapped up in the number game way more than ever made me reevaluate where the hell I was personally. The number-follower game is such a cruel game to even “play.” The word influencer correlates to scoring 10K+ followers and somehow means you have all the world’s authority to get all the sponsorships and free shit in the world.
ECKKKK.
No disrespect to influencers because they’re bomb at what they can do. That’s why they have that following, but when I even think about myself working so hard to achieve a NUMBER, I have to ask myself, “What am I doing this for? Who am I doing this for? Why?”
Ultimately, this led me to my new focus this month. I touched on it a bit on Twitter:
Last night (LOL I honestly don’t know why it took me so long but I made it) I had a long journal session that pretty much came to the conclusion of how much one app alone (hi, Instagram) has f*cked up my way of thinking. pic.twitter.com/DzL8wQ6Cpw
— Ashley Bulayo (@ashleeeybash) February 3, 2021
As I say and say again, I have no idea what I’m doing. I have no idea where I want to focus my time. I’m learning things as I go, just like everyone else. I’m slowly reeling away from Instagram (except for IG Stories and other accounts I run) and lean into my blog & YouTube because that’s what I love to do.
This whole worrying about vanity metrics is not an easy thing to accomplish. I’m OK right now as I type this but check in with me in about a week. I might be changing where I’ve fixated on the number game again.
Also, all of *gestures hands* this made me appreciate “the outside world” so much more. I mentally yell at myself to look up, to listen to podcasts, to remember that life is seriously more than staring at your phone & laptop. I guess it’s kind of easy to forget if you’re so stuck in this lifestyle and the fact I’m working in an industry that tries so hard to convince someone to stare at your brand a little bit longer. Oooooh yeah.
